Why Men Lie? It’s a bit tricky actually… When a woman is confident, she’s like a positive force than enables her relationship to thrive and blossom.However, when a woman has been lied to in the past, she gets wounded and feels insecure.
She becomes fearful that the same thing is possible in her current relationship too.
Thus, instead of enjoying her relationship and drawing strength and joy from it, she begins to ‘check’ her man. She doesn’t trust him and he becomes wary of her suspicious attitude.
Even worse, she constantly seeks validation from him – she wants to confirm that her doubts are not true! In other words, the woman becomes needy and this drives her man away, ultimately resulting in a failed relationship.
Once a woman has been lied to, it can potentially destroy all her future relationships! Which brings us to the question – why do men lie? Let us take a look inside the male mind and understand the root cause of lies.
1) Women want men to lie! Yes, that’s right!
You’re probably a bit baffled and even outraged at that statement. Your argument is that you always strive for honesty in the relationship.
No – you don’t!
When a man tells a woman a truth that she doesn’t like, she gets mad at him and creates a huge drama.
She gets overly emotional and does not respond calmly and rationally to the situation. Thus, the man learns that if he tells the truth – he gets yelled at, gets blamed and is called insensitive. Next time, he chooses the easier option and lies – he tells you what you want to hear instead of the truth!
He doesn’t want to hurt your feelings. He thinks that he is actually being smart and nice.
If you punish a man for telling him the truth, you are essentially training him to lie.
It can all start with a trivial matter like the clichés:
- Do I look fat in this dress?
- Or – Is she prettier than me?
Well, you know that she is prettier than you. That’s exactly why you asked the question! Still, most men will say NO just to avoid a confrontation. Don’t provoke men to lie to you – it’ll hurt you big time in the long run!
2) Here is the other side of the story – Men feel tremendous pressure to impress women.
Believe it or not, when a man fears that he is ‘not good enough’ for a woman, he lies about his achievements, past experiences and so on.
This doesn’t qualify as a complement to woman. The man is actually lying because he is insecure about him abilities and social image. For a woman to have a rewarding, fulfilling relationship with a man – they both should be confident enough to be ‘real’ with each other.
When either of them lies, it just weakens the bond between them.
A relationship built on lies, insecurity and mistrust is very likely to crumble. This is exactly why I do not advocate tricks and routines to impress men.
If you want to attract guys, learn to do it while still being yourself. If you feel that you’re not good enough – improve! It is the only way to build rock solid confidence.
3) Many women judge men for being men.
They don’t understand that men need time to do manly things such as playing or watching sports, drinking beer, fixing cars, discussing politics with other men and making plans to save the world etc.
If a man doesn’t engage in these activities periodically, he begins to feel frustrated.
However, if he tells his wife/girlfriend that he has finished work and is heaving over to the bar or pub to have a good time with his buddies – she will whine, nag and complain.
She’ll tell him that he doesn’t love her anymore and that he avoids spending time with her….he uses her….blah blah blah. As a result of this, the man may simply tell her that he’s busy at work and will be late.
One of the key steps to attract men is to NOT compete with distractions such as his buddies, sports etc.
Give him space.
You’re probably angry that he is enjoying with friends while you are bored and lonely at home. So don’t sit at home – get out and enjoy with your friends too! Have an active social life so that you don’t become solely dependent upon your man for emotional validation.
You will be amazed at the results you get if you encourage men to be honest with you instead of indirectly training them to lie!